Interracial dating black lives matter


  1. Episode 5: Black Lives Matter … Everyday
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They used my body to live out their racist fetishes.

Episode 5: Black Lives Matter … Everyday

I was their jezebel. I allowed them to own my body and manipulate my emotions so long as the price was right. These and other sexual choices I made were rooted in anti-Black, misogynoiristic violence, and they severely impacted my mental, spiritual, and emotional health. My depression became less manageable and more omnipresent.

Former Navy officer rails against Black Lives Matter

Organic, healthy romance was a concept with which I grew increasingly unfamiliar. I was incapable of romantic empathy, although I pined for it desperately.

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At an impasse between my anti-Black attractions and self-Love, I grew detached from both romantic desire and my own sexuality. As my romantic life stalled, I was becoming more heavily involved in the Movement for Black Lives. In time, I grew less enchanted with reform, and more committed to the full divestment and overthrow of white supremacy. As my pro-Black politic became more radical and militant, so too did my Love of Black People and, more strenuously, my Love for Self.


Nothing else is comparable, and anything less is unacceptable. I understand that my experiences with white people are not shared by all. But often when the discussion of interracial dating arises I find that many tell the same anti-Black dishonesties I once told, even in self-proclaimed Black radical circles. These dishonesties come in the form of pretending that Black people are romantically inaccessible, or in attempting to disassociate white people from white supremacy.


But the dishonesty that angers me most is when Black people say their sexual union with whites is a form of reparative justice ; that because Black people are owed reparations, they fuck white people and expect some sort of compensation. While the politics of interracial sex work are worth exploring, we must remain clear that reparations are not an exchange of goods, they are an unconditional payment from whites to Black people with the goal of socioeconomic restoration after having had our generational wealth stolen from us.

Alongside these dishonesties is the act of evading the reality of fetishization. White people, indoctrinated by the edicts of centuries-long white supremacy, viscerally view Black bodies as non-human and beastial. All—yes, all —white people have reduced Black people to our body parts and alleged sexual promiscuity as part of their participation in white identity formation.

Anti-Blackness, no matter the context, instance, or situation, is obviously harmful to Black people. All in one, biracial Black children become mammies , magical negroes , and jezebels. Their existences boiled down to their abilities to educate us Black, white, and non-Black alike on the benefits of fictional race-free love and their willingness to help us create a fictional race-free world, all while being sexually desirable due to their race-free otherness.

  1. Interracial dating in the time of #BlackLivesMatter.
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Seven years on and I still have problems with my current boyfriend, a white New Zealander. Obviously we're not subjected to online abuse from gossip sites being that we're not in any Hollywood film franchises, or performing at Glastonbury. But we do get "looks" when we're walking down the street together - especially when we leave London.

Sometimes they're glances of pure disgust. Much of the time it seems to be confusion and uncertainty "are they even allowed to date in her culture?

My boyfriend never notices. Unlike me he's never had to develop a "racism radar", where you instinctively know that people are staring because of your skin colour. Lots of my black and ethnic minority BAME friends, who date white people, tell me the same thing. Their partners never realise. It can come from inside the BAME community too.

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  • An Indian girlfriend of mine, whose ex was white, tells me that when they used to walk around in London, holding hands, other Indians would stare. It always felt like they were trying to say I was betraying my culture and religion by choosing to be with someone outside of it. One jokingly refers to her boyfriend as her "vanilla secret" as her extended family in India have no idea he exists.

    For many interracial couples, this is perfectly normal. They take it all in their stride. We expect the jokes about how our skin colours mine brown; his freckled look different on the beach. We know people will be curious about how our families feel about it absolutely fine.