- 8 Signs You're Dating A Mama's Boy
- How to Deal With a Boyfriend Who Is a Mama's Boy | Our Everyday Life
- Know What You Are Getting Into
Watching a codependent mother-son relationship play out is a rather unsightly and disturbing thing to witness, in my opinion. Here are some signs that you are dating a man whose relationship with his mama will always come first.
8 Signs You're Dating A Mama's Boy
A major part of adulthood is being able to think for yourself. A man who is always doing what his mother says can torpedo a relationship real fast. What if she ends up not liking you? But, try to look at it from the viewpoint of a concerned mother who wants her son happy and is at the same time terrified that a girlfriend would separate him from her. Make your relationship with his mother a priority.
Meet her whenever possible and wish her well on birthdays and special occasions. Make her your ally and not an adversary. Give the mother and son more opportunities to be together by inviting them to your family get-togethers, special occasions and celebrations at your home. Pay no heed to irritating mama-related remarks such as "You definitely cannot cook like my mother," or "You need to learn organization from my mother," that will inevitably spew out during conversations.
How to Deal With a Boyfriend Who Is a Mama's Boy | Our Everyday Life
Talk to your boyfriend regarding your feelings without sounding demanding. Tell him that while you do not want to break their mother-son relationship, you would like a little more attention from him. Sometimes, miracles do happen, and he might just understand you.
You are your own self. Recognize what is coming from his relationship with his mother and what are reasonable demands for your relationship. Your boyfriend needs to draw the line himself and assert his own independence, according to psychologist and marriage and family counselor Marie Hartwell-Walker on the website PsychCentral.
If you've accepted that he is and will always be a mama's boy, get a grip on any resentments that you may have. Consider befriending his mom. This allows him to have her around as much as he needs, but also makes you part of the picture. For example, when she calls for her daily updates, put her on speaker phone so all three of you can discuss what's going on.
Discuss who makes the decisions in your relationship.
Know What You Are Getting Into
True mama's boys often let mom make their decisions -- even as an adult. While making choices for him as a grade schooler was acceptable, deciding what he wears, where he goes and who he sees is no longer necessary. This is especially true when it comes to your relationship. Let him know how you feel and what you believe is -- and isn't -- appropriate for her to decide. For example, you may think that it's perfectly fine for her to choose where the three of you go out to dinner, but you may not want her to have the final say on the new apartment that you and your guy are selecting.
Based in Pittsburgh, Erica Loop has been writing education, child development and parenting articles since
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