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- When You Catch Your Partner in an Online Dating Site
- When You Catch Your Partner in an Online Dating Site - ACW
So my boyfriend recently transpired that. It is very kind of you to look for the best in this situation. Topics Life and style Swipe right - online dating for the real world. Order by newest oldest recommendations. Show 25 25 50 All. Threads collapsed expanded unthreaded. He has not been on there since, but has not deleted it yet either. I also found out that he uses Flirt and Are You Interested through Facebook and it appears that on one of those sites he was recently active, although I am not sure how long it takes to not log into the account for it to say otherwise.
I am not sure what to do or how long to wait to ask him about not deleting his account and also how to ask him about his other accounts. Things have been going wonderful aside from this, he seems very genuine and kind, not the type of person to cheat at all. All of his past relationships were very long term. He talks of a future with me, so I am stumped on how to handle this, help please!! My ex boyfriend of 13 months flirted with women all the time, though I never felt threatened until a year into the relationship.
His feelings had changed, he was flirting with a woman by text on his phone whose name he was lying about. I read the messages and confronted him, and he used the excuse that he did not cheat, flirts all the time, but he is also very insecure with himself and his age. We all flirt, sure, but this I consider cyber cheating. The other woman does not know that a girlfriend exists, and he thinks he is allowed and that it is not disrespectful. We, of course, broke up, and he can now continue to look for whatever he thinks he deserves but will never find. I have the exact opposite problem..
Perhaps, you, Brad, can help me out and explain this. I met this guy a little over 3 weeks ago on POF… After going out every day for about 10 days, talking on the phone daily several times a day, and texting in between he complained that I still had a profile up on POF so did he. I removed my profile; he HID his!!! Then we had a discussion about being exclusive including removing profiles, etc.
He did remove his profile from POF and match. To me this sounds like some trust issues on his part that go deeper than the visibility of a dating profile. You were co-operative which again makes me think he just feels insecure. I too am going through a similar issue. I have been with my guy for almost two years. Well his last stint out of town really had the jealousy wheels turning, for the reason mentioned above, as well as his recent induction into the world of Facebook in which I am nowhere to be found on his profile mentioned as a girlfriend or a picture and he listed he is interested in….
He read the mail, which was someone winking at him. No picture or other information and right after creating and logging in yesterday, he unsubscribed from emails. But did not delete his account. Glad to know there are others out there but it saddens me to know that this seems to be so common amongst mostly men. If nothing comes of the browsing, is it worth mentioning and possibly creating a huge fight over? I think I just found my answer, as hard as it is to swallow.
If I went browsing on dating site, my wife would punch me in the nose and I support her in that decision. Why look at real people in your area and be tempted to contact them? There are issues with Match. I really just wanna punch him the face!!! After my emotional abusive ex broke up with me I looked into his emails as I thought there was more to it. We lived together for two years. Anyway I saw an email he and his friend were sending eachother.
And how he has to man up and give me the breakup speech. He met the ex before me on there and I asked him which one they met on and he said he forgot. And he always deleted his browser history. I hate to say it but I am glad that I am not the only one to have been in this horrible position. Ladies, this is just pitiful.
We are strong and wonderful creatures so can we please start to act like it? This goes for me, too. After all, in my mind it is much, much better to be single and happy than to be with someone who makes you feel inadequate, insecure and overall lonely. I met a guy a year ago off match. For about months it was on and off. We went a great mount of time not seeing each other or talking. Over the summer we just randomly stopped talking. This past September he initiated contact and we have been dating ever since.
We talk on the phone every day and see each other times a week. In November I texted him and told him I really liked him and needed to know if he saw this going somewhere. He said he really liked me too and that he was going with the flow. He said he is always busy and tired from work which he is , but would like to see each other more and see where it goes. I asked if he was dating anyone else and he said no.
I assumed after this conversion we were exclusive. The past three weeks he has been extremely busy more than usual and I have only seen him once. Some friends suggested that maybe he was dating other girls and recommended I check if he was still on match. I reactivated my account yesterday, and looked him up, and sure enough he had logged on the day before.
I checked again and he was online again today. Im so heartbroken since we have known each other for almost a year now. I am currently going through what everyone on here has. This is the third guy I have dated that has done this. I am about ready to confront him about it when he comes down this weekend. He should not be surprised after all he is the one who said he would delete his. I just reactivated mine. I am waiting to see if he says anything about it.
Exclusivety if that is a word is what any serious relationship is about. There are somewhere guys who ARE looking for a serious relationship. Go online yourself then give him the flick!! Emailed for two months. Scheduled a visit to see me.
Prior to his visit, my subscription ended, so I hid my profile so as not to get any more emails, though I did get some from previous corresponders. I logged in now and then, and noticed for about a week his was still on. Another week goes by and his profile is gone. So then I got to checking his activity, while I was hidden. Silly cat and mouse. What do you make of that? I know why mine is hidden and active now — checking on his activity. I wonder why his is hidden and active… any ideas other than he could be doing the same as I am?
Anyway, we finally met in my state a couple of weekends ago. This is his typical MO from before we met, I just thought after meeting, claiming he had a great time, wants me to visit, wants to come back that he would contact more. I really can only guess but I do think hiding the profile is a great first step.
A year into our relationship I found out that the same week he met me he had a one night stand and she became pregnant as the result. I had a very hard time accepting this and I will admit it took me a long time to get over it. Also in the same month he became a father he took a vacation to Australia for a week to visit a long time female friend, who paid for the trip.
I did not approve of this trip since she had told him in the past that she thought she was in love with him. He explained to me that she was married and had a family and her husband knew that he was coming to visit. So again I had to get over it.
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About a year and a half onto our relationship I found that he had not signed out of his email so I started reading them. I couldnt believe my eyes! Messages from all kinds of women. So he took me to pick out a engagement ring and I forgave him. Now were two years into the relationship, I have never received the ring, I think he went and got his deposit back, and today I found him on a dating website. Hi Brad, I met my boyfriend from Okcupid.
He even have dreams and plans for our future. On our first month of our relationship, he introduced me to his family who were took a vacation here in US they from Ireland. Regarding for sex, we usually have sex 3 times a week, thus, this really puzzled me. I also found this out that his lying that he will remove his account the said dating site.
Brad, I need your advice. Vhalotte — I wrote another article that expanded on this topic that you can see here: I do think you need to bring this up with him. I have been dating a guy for a year and a half — met through friends. We talked about marriage — we already have kids from prior realationships. I recently found out hes on a dating website — no pic, not paying account.
I know his passwords so when i checked it, i found out that he browes pictures, and emailed 4 woman. He received many emails but he cant open since hes not a paying user. Should I confront him? Is this something men do just in their spare time, browse? I sent a note to POF to let them know that could cause problems!
See if they fix it…. Another thing to consider — I may be wrong, but Match. However, this only happens if the profile is visible which often is the real problem.
When You Catch Your Partner in an Online Dating Site
Thanks for the clarification about Match. Internet dating certainly does complicate life…. Saved me all that misery…… a good thing! I have been dating the same girl for almost 7 months now and her excuse for being online was originally that she wanted to try and get her 6 month guarantee money from Match. She told me this when were at the 4 month mark of dating. We are both in our 40s so game playing time should have been up long ago.
She acted offended that I would confront her about it and said she would take it down. Brads May 13, comments are very pertinent to my situation. Bottom line is this type of thing goes both ways. Please Guys write Your Experience on here too, so at least we genuine women will have faith again..
When You Catch Your Partner in an Online Dating Site - ACW
Well I definitely know that this happens to guys too because it is currently happening to me right now. My boyfriend and I have been in a relationship for about 2 months now and I know for a fact that his dating profile is still active on the site me met on. It told me the time that comment was made and it turns out that he made that comment weeks after we had started dating.
So I confronted him about it and he got upset that I had been snooping. He said that the only reason he posted that was because the other guy said something nice about one of his pictures. So after a evening of arguing over the phone I ended up being the one who was apologizing for trying to undermine our relationship with distrust. So I told him I would delete my account so that this whole nightmare would be over….. I feel so confused right now and soooooo sick to think what he could be doing all of the time. We communicate with each other daily over the phone, video chatting, texting…..
He always tells me how much he loves me and our relationship is going so well…. Kick these morons — women OR men to the curb. The answer is obvious. He is looking for better options. READ about this online. These men and women have red flags a flying. If YOU feel their behavior is inherently questionable, trust your instinct.
BS he has been on every site out there which is fine but to LIE about it along with age and criminal history — lets say I am still paying for who he pretended to be and who he actually IS. He leaves behind a path of ex gfs and a wife who know they should have trusted what should be obvious: DO NOT end up giving them the benefit of the doubt — you will lose your self esteem, question the golden rules you knew in kindergarten and everything that should be upright is upside down. He treated me like CRAP, lied about his age and his intent.
I found this out because I snooped. Suspicious activity had to be followed up on.
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Anyways, I made a fake profile. Sorry to anyone else going through this. My heart goes out to you. I could use a friend right now too. I met my husband married 10 years this summer on match. I had to only tell him once: What are we doing here? Three months in we were engajed, married within a year of meeting and going strong. When a man loves and respects you you know it.